Minimalism and TOYS

Anyone who has kids or regularly spends time with kids or regularly visits a domicile in which KIDS INHABIT, knows that the TOYS creep everywhere.  I'm pretty sure we are not alone in this and that it happens naturally no matter the NUMBER of toys, but it certainly takes us a long time to clean up/organize/retrieve/locate all of Big E's toys - or we don't and everything just piles up around us like some awful princess-hued hoarder show (yes,I've accepted that her favorite colors ARE purple and pink - I've stopped trying to resist it).  It's one of the galvanizing issues behind me wanting to simplify our stuff.  I've been perusing Joshua Becker's "Clutterfree With Kids" for tips/tricks on controlling Big E's share of our STUFF.  One bit he emphasizes in involving the kids in making the decisions for what goes to the garbage, what gets donated, and what is to keep.

I was dubious about this working for us as a common phrase out of Big E's mouth is: "But this is SPECIAL to me!" (usually while holding a bit of grubby WikiStik or one of her 15 acorn tops).  So I was prepared for a bit of a struggle as I waded through piles of broken mardi gras beads, bits of stone/sea glass/walnut shells/beads/etc, and Disney princesses in various akimbo positions and states of undress (the princesses spend most of their time in the nude these days) in order to broach the subject with our 4 year old.  I tried to talk with her about our reasons behind simplifying our stuff: less time needed to clean up, makes the stuff we keep "more special", it feels good to donate things to people who don't have as much as we do, etc. Eddy took to the idea surprisingly well - she had a few neat observations that fell right in line with what I'd been reading.  One of the biggest/most spreading types of clutter she has right now is her "Treasure" - it's pretty cool to be fair: blue sea glass, beads, smooth stones, acorns, walnut shells, etc - I can totally see my 4-5 year old self in her when she sorts, counts,  touches, and treasures her "Treasure."  But as we were cleaning it up, Eddy lamented: "It's so hard to clean up my Treasure all the time, there's so much of it." 

Presto!  Perfect segue way into simplifying so it's not so hard to clean up!  Of her own suggestion, this then prompted Eddy to pare down her treasure to ONE of each kind of treasure (one bead, one rock, one piece of sea glass, etc) - the rest was placed in a bucket to LIVE OUTSIDE.  Maybe she'll remember they're out there - maybe not - at least it won't be in the house anymore.  A few minutes later . . . "I have these shells, but this one is really special because M gave it to me, and THIS one is really special because Daddy gave it to me.  I don't know which one to give away - I don't know what to do (insert furrowed brow here.)" 

Yes!!(Paraphrasing here)  "Because you have been doing such a great job of getting rid of parts of treasure that are not as special to you, it is ok to keep parts that are REALLY SPECIAL, like a shell that makes you think of Daddy or your friend M."

We continued on from their with simplifying the mardi gras beads (especially the broken ones), books, crap in her dress-up box, etc.  Her play area is still crowded, but we've made a pretty significant dent - one big bag to give away and 2 boxes of throw aways.  So not only did this little exercise help cut down on stuff in E's play area, it also gave us the opportunity to problem solve and talk about what's important - not STUFF per se, but family and friends :)  I hope to revisit her play area (and other areas) repeatedly - to keep down the clutter, and so as not to freak about getting rid of everything all at once.  And I figure, even if E wanted to keep things that I would rather get rid of this time around, she herself will probably get more selective each time we do this - which will likely be before/after holidays/birthdays, really anytime her worldly possessions start to increase again and creep across our floors. 

Related to that, a future post will likely focus on Gift Giving.  In preparation for that post, I'm going to float an idea out there to my family.  My Dad's side of the family (as that family began to exponentially grow) many years ago began a quasi-Secret-Santa style of gift-giving at Christmas.  Everyone's name went onto a list and each person then was given a name on that list and had to get a present for that ONE person.  We'll discuss the possible merits of this in the post, but for now, WHAT DO YOU THINK? 

Out With the Old - To Make Room for the New

And now we are four :)  It's amazing how the addition of one (now) 10 pound loaf of loveliness can change everything - and nothing.  Eddy is suddenly a BIG SISTER with "binky" duties and that whole sharing the limelight thing (oh, that old chestnut).  Jesse and I now regularly have to divide and conquer - and when we "switch" it's not to give the other person a break, it's to give them a break from whichever little person is proving most difficult at that particular time! 

But we still get up early.  We still have our morning coffee.  We've been berry-picking several times this summer.  Our house is still a mess - which brings me to the inspiration for today's post . . .

To make way for our brandy-new Mr E, it is time - now more than ever - to pare down our belongings, to minimize, to simplify.  Several of you know I've been toying with the idea of steering towards a more "minimalist" household and have given away a few bags of books and clothes so far.  I've been perusing this site and this one for tips and tricks, for the benefits behind living with LESS STUFF.  I am drawn to the idea that having less stuff around creates intention and value for the stuff that you DO keep around.  I am a pack-rat by nature - with a conflicting anxiety response that kicks in when I'm surrounded by all the "pack" that this rat has accumulated over the past 30 years.  My most common internal monologue of justification for keeping something goes in 2 directions: "What if I need this?"  And, "But I really SHOULD be using this more often."  Between the two of them, I've kept some of the most ridiculous of items FOR YEARS.  A brief sampling:

• class notes from college (no, not grad school, UNDERgrad notes in subjects such as Latin American Foreign Policy)
• a trunk-full of "exercise" t-shirts
• 8 pairs of black stockings - almost all with holes in the toe and/or heel
• the (still working) gear of a music box that has sentimental value ONLY because-this-is-something-that-is-supposed-to-have-sentimental-value-right???
• and (most recently - even in the midst of the purging and minimalist research) BOXES of toilet paper tubes because Eddy MIGHT be able to do a crafty project with them

Yeah.

Right now the urge to purge is strong enough that I've been imagining the four of us roughing it in a gypsy caravan (Danny the Champion of the World-style) on our 40 acres of pristine farmland.  Yes, we would be THOSE people.  I don't think we're going to go that far, but certainly  throwing out toilet paper tubes, donating some books, and putting a few posts on craigslist require no real irrevocable commitment.

And, in the spirit of following through with this experiment in owning (and organizing and cleaning and spending money on) less, I'll be putting up several posts in the coming weeks relating to our quest to simplify, ie "Minimalism and Toys", "Minimalism and Your Closet", "Minimalism and Gift-Giving" etc.  Hang in there with me folks, the goal of this venture and these posts is to reduce clutter in our lives to make room for the truly important things: relationships, family, quality over quantity.